I don’t mean start wearing colorful propeller hats.

But when you ask a toddler what they want to wear, they’ll almost always pick something slightly too big or too small, entirely weather-inappropriate, and most definitely not suited for the occasion. Sparkles and tutus for daycare. Their last Halloween costume to the grocery store. Because really—why wear jeans when you can be Batman?

The truth is, most of the following points apply to all relationships, but long-distance love magnifies them, forcing you to face certain realities sooner rather than later.

If you’re in one (or considering it), here’s what you need to know.

In 2019, I embarked on a family trip to Peru—a last-minute decision that would forever change my life.